Do you fume when your neighbor listening song with a loud volume at your study hour? A traffic jam burns your brains? Your non cooperative children are making you short tempered? Your blood pressure rises suddenly very high for a few annoying thing? Don’t be panic. Anger is a normal healthy physical phenomenon.
But everyone should control his or her anger, because it ruins almost everything. Short tempered man may face cooperation and relation problem with his coworkers, boss, friends and family members. It kills happiness sometimes.
Everyone should try to control their anger. Here are some steps for controlling your anger.
Recognize your anger:
1. Identify and make a list of triggering factors of your anger- Try to identify-
- Circumstances that make you angry, such as any advice from others about what to do or what wrong you have done etc.
- Identify how you feel
- Sort out, in that time how you behave
- When the episode gone what you feel?
Recognizing the anger sometimes enough to control it.
2. Identify your body changes and warning signs- Try to understand what you feel during anger-
- Is your heart beating faster?
- Are you breathing quickly?
- Is your body becoming tense and you are flashing? etc.
Recognize the signs. Try to identify what is happening to your body during anger. It will help you to control the madness and you can apply the techniques identifying the anger episode.
Learn and apply some techniques to control anger:
1. Control your mind and thoughts: During this episode, your thoughts can get overstated and foolish. Try to replace the thoughts with more rational thinking. Try to think positive and do some self talk.
- Before the episode you have to believe that you can handle this even it is rough. Plan about what to do positive when you will get angry.
- During the episode of angriness try to stay calm, relax and try to feel you are okay and you can act like calm. Try to breathe easy.
- After the episode you should feel, you have managed that very well. You were angry but you controlled it with your coolness.
2. Take a break: If you think you are losing the control and bursting with anger you should take a break. Take little time out. Try to leave the room and avoid the argument. Take little walk. Plan how to control your anger during the conversation.
3. Try to use a distraction: Try to distract your mind with other matter during the episode. If possible avoid the conversation totally. You may try to do other work at that time like-
- Try to count up to 10
- Talk to other people
- Focus your mind with other surrounding little things like environment, your room decoration etc.
4. Use relaxation technique: Try to do some relaxation technique like deep breathing, focusing on your breathing, progressive light exercises to stretch your body etc. to be calm.
These are some techniques that can help you to control your anger during an episode. But you should do some regular practices to strength your mind to get control over your anger.
Regular activities that will help you to control anger in any situation:
There are some regular activities that will help you to control your emotions and anger.
1. Talk about your feelings to your friend: Talk about your feelings and emotions regarding any annoying matter to your close friends. It will help to relax your mind.
2. Take regular exercise: Regular exercise help to develop your physical as well as your mental stamina and improve your cognitive skill to control anger.
3. Take meditation and yoga: Try to spend a few minutes to take some stress relieving exercise like meditation and yoga. Meditation will relax your mind and improve your control over anger.
4. Take proper nutrition: There are certain nutrients; deficiency of them can make you restless, irritated and weak. Vitamin B1, B6, B12 is essential for our nerves and other micronutrient also responsible for maintaining your body properly. Deficiency of them may lead you in an irritated condition.
5. Take proper sleep: Sleeping well is very important to lead a calm and healthy life. Sleep disturbance is often responsible for being irritated on everything. A proper sleep pattern will help you to gain over control on your anger.
6. Try to do some creative work: Doing creative thing like writing, designing etc. are brain exercises. These creative works help you to gain control over your brain as well as over your anger.
7. Take some institutional course:
- Learn some assertiveness skills: Assertive skill can be learnt by attending courses or by reading books. These skills make sure that anger is spoken in clear and polite ways. They also help you to take everything positively.
- Attend anger management programs: Anger management programs mainly help you to control your anger by one to one counseling and work in a small group. Take few classes and gain some skills to control your anger.
- Visit a doctor: If you are still failing to control your temper you should visit your doctor for further management.
Try to do these steps regularly. You will be gaining control on your mind and anger within few weeks.
Dr. Hasan Ebna Amin